Tuesday, November 23, 2010 @1:47 AM ♥
Engineering Essentials, the new subject for the semester. First thing, i don't even understand why are we learning all these. Second thing, back to basic = MATHS. The subject i hate the most way back in secondary school, but i miss basic maths that we learnt in primary school? (:
MPJ'S final year project, "script, lights, actions" ! I am kinda excited but nervous at the same time. Excited to act, but nervous to speak.
CPG, the subject where-by i learn about 3D. One thing to tell you, i NEVER come for the lesson on time and i NEVER know a single thing about it, and my work is NEVER done by myself. I'm dead(FULLSTOP)
How's life then, you ask? This hot-tempered girl's temper and maybe attitude too getting worse, i think. She got easily pissed-off and fucked-up with even a tiny small little things these days. When she's mad, she will tend to be very rude i can say. Oh man! She just needs a tight slap and needs to learn self-control. She got too over-emotional too at times, and cried so much for over a small matter. She cried too much, and eat so little. Two words, NO APPETITE. Lame i know, but it's the fact and the fact is the fact. Understand?
These few nights. in my room- outside my window, even now, i can smell "kemenyian" . The thing that we Muslims use when someone die. I am kind of scared, because the smell is so strong. I am having a blocked nose now and i can hardly breathe but it's so strong that i still can smell it. I am kind of scared, and this happens only i realise after my uncle's death. Maybe he is around me to visit me? That's what i told myself, and if it's true i am happy. Just continue like this. but please don't reveal yourself here infront of my eyes. I will faint, i tell you!
Counting to the days for my escape from Singapore, TWO more days. But guess what? I am not happy. My passport is still not ready yet, i am very very sad. Later i will be meeting cousin Sasha at 5am for breakfast and i shall go school from there. And right after school, i got no choice but my mum asked me to go to Lavender and meet the staff itself. Hopefully, what i dreamt about yesterday when i slept right after i came back from school, will turn-out to be the opposite. Insyallah.
Monday, November 15, 2010 @3:09 AM ♥
On Thursday, 11November2010(11112010) , i've lost someone that is very meaningful to me. My beloved uncle passed away, and that has a great impact on me. He was the one and only uncle that is closest to me. We shared many happy moments together with no one else but just us. I teared in everything i do since the day he was gone, there's just too many sweet memories. He never fails to make me laugh, he never fails to remember me in no matter what he do and where he goes. I remembered arriving at my grandmother's house ,with him, eagerly telling me to eat the food that he bought for me as he knows what i like to eat. The last food he bought for me, few days before he was gone, was mee bakso. The last food he shared with me was a desert. The last time i talked to him was on the phone for very long, he was asking me to accompany him to the hospital for a follow-up check-up for his operation which supposingly to be on the 16th nov. One of my aunt told me, before he was gone, he told her that he wanted to ask me out to eat at Eastpoint's banquet. I remembered him telling my nenek that he "sayang" me, very touching i know. ;( I can't probably be listing all down here because it will be a never ending one. You know the feeling where-by you cried too much till you can't even cry anymore? That's what i am now.
And he passed away in that condition.
Dear my beloved uncle,
it looks like my heart really crashed to see you go. I never got the chance to apologize to you for all my wrongdoings and i never got the chance to fulfill my dreams to return you for all the good-deeds you did to me. I will never forget that, and most importantly YOU as the uncle that always gave me strength and encouragement in the things i do. I don't wan't you to go but at the same time i can't bare to see you suffer any longer. ALLAH also has seen how you suffered much and that he loves you more and took you with him. I'll never stop praying hard for you and will your roe be peacefully grounded in heaven. I hope you're safe and doing fine up there. I MISS YOU, UNCLE. I'll come and visit you this Wednesday, insyallah.
With love,
Sheila
Wednesday, November 10, 2010 @7:01 PM ♥
Yesterday i woke-up at 3+pm only to know that i was late for school, i absent myself for the entire day of lesson/s. From that point of time till now, i'm awake and that totals up of more than twelve-hours of not sleeping. Right now i am blogging, before i lay myself on the bed in the air-conditioned room and maybe snore till the bright sky, because i feel like doing it. No, actually.... that's NOT the reason...erm... maybe...it's the new pretty background that i've just changed that makes me feel like posting. Hehee. :P I won't get headaches if i forced myself to sleep that night, but things will get better if i stayed home instead of going to school just now. I'm having my period days that most of the time has made me pissed off/fucked up with even small little things but today i managed to control everything. *insert many many smiley face*
Class was supposed to be dismissed at six-pm but my teacher gave the permission to those who completed their work to go home two hours before the actual, and so i went home. If not at this time, i won't be home yet. Tommorrow is Thursday, and the day after is already going to be Friday, and i am having pimples all over my face, partly because of my menses, which means that my passport-picture will be fucking disgusting unless i pay the photographer to photoshop my picture after taking it, and that will never gonna happen obviously! And Thursday also means that i will have Sports&Wellness lesson. The five-stations equipment and the running track/neighbourhood pathway for 2.4km run is waiting for me. I'm quite a heavy smoker and obviously i'm not fit, which means i've got to sacrifice and force myself through all those.
If you don't see me online tonight, you should already know why lurhh hah.
I need the bed now, like seriously.
Goodnight readers!
Monday, November 8, 2010 @5:21 AM ♥
Life's good so far,overall. Except that things didn't turned-out well over at my grandma's place and i really hope everything's gonna be alright, insyallah.
Besides that, i've got no new pictures to post with anymore because my memory card just died on me. And finally i've fully recovered from my worse-enemy-sickness that is flu with the help of myself to eat and take medicine at the appropriate timing despite feeling so really damn sick!
Sometimes, i don't want to go to sleep because i am afraid to dream about things that will get me paranoid. These days i kept on dreaming about randomly weird things and i am scared. I occupy myself by TUMBLR-ing that has got me so addictive to it and playing my all-time favourite Youda online games.
